April 26, 2010
- Coming Out
Dear Mrs. Figgins:
I am a 33 year old man and a medical doctor. I have fought being gay for a very long time, and no loinger want to deny who I am.
I am from a very close family, and I have wonderful loving parents, and they have no idea that I am gay.
I have fallen in love with Paul. I’ve known him since grade school.
My parents know his family and they love Paul as another son. They also know that he’s gay because a few years ago Paul came out to his family and friends.
On one hand, I’m afraid to come out to my parents for fear that they will blame Paul thinking that he talked me into this. But nothing could be further from the truth. I cannot change who I am.
I am so happy I want to shout it out from the rooftop! Yet, I’m really feeling lost as to what to do?
William, SC
Dear William:
Your apprehension is understandable. Unfortunately it is still uncomfortable for most gay people to take the step out of the closet, especially to their parents, family and friends.
Sexuality is an important part of who we are as humans. Sexual orientation is not a personal choice. It is a matter of genetics.
You need to believe that your family and friends truly care about you and want your happiness. Being honest with yourself and your parents is the most important first step.
By your own words, you have wonderful parents. This may or may not be difficult for them to accept immediately. As excited and happy as you are to share your feelings and love, remember your parents are hearing this for the first time. Show respect, kindness and patience. This too shall pass, because they love you.
Who we are as human beings is what are ultimately judged on.
Trust that if we face life with integrity, it will be a wonderful ride full of priceless memories.
Mrs. Figgins
Advice & opinion on everyday issues by Mrs Figgins with common sense & good old-fashioned-values!
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